My Secret Santa Secret

For the first time in a long time, I declined to join in on the office ritual of Secret Santa. I had the genuine excuse of not really having the finances this year to part with the money for a gift for someone who isn't family or a dear friend. But in fact, I don't like the whole concept of Secret Santa gift giving, have never liked it, and have some reasons for my dislike which I think are quite valid.

The first is that Secret Santa isn't. By whatever method is used, each person gets the name of another person in the office. It's then becomes a strategic guessing game to figure out who got who. Some will readily part with the information, especially if they can find out who got them in the process. Others will try to covet their person's name, but won't succeed. I always tried to be in the latter group. I could keep it a secret right up until the gifts had to be left out for the the big reveal, when the spies were at their most active. The office needs to know so that when the gifts are opened, they know exactly who gave WHAT to whom. Trust me, with about half the names and by process of elimination, someone other than the person officially keeping tabs will have it all figured out before the gift wrap comes off the boxes.

Then, there's the gift. Now, I've participated in Secret Santa where the person not only writes their name, but also a few suggestions for gift-giving that are within the allowed cost. But for the most part, I've been in ones when the gift was left up to gift-giver, to someone who doesn't know you and usually will go with the generic "one size fits most occasions" gift.  Most people are overwhelmed enough already by shopping for family and close friends.  The coworker that they rarely interact with may not necessarily be in line for that thoughtful gifting process after everything else is being said and done and I can understand that completely. 

The mentality of everyone should get a gift so they don't feel left out is for children and I'm not a child.  Quite frankly, I'd rather get nothing than a gift that only fills a work-social obligation.  Some would say that's harsh and potentially creates bad feelings in the workplace.  Perhaps, but I doubt it'll last much beyond the first day of the new year.

In case you want to call me a Scrooge or a Grinch for my terrible work gift attitude, hold off for a second.  Want to know where the money went that I didn't spend on a Secret Santa gift?  I didn't spend it on myself.  It got added to the money that I give every year to local charities, to places where I know it will do good things for people who need it more than I do.  It's a little better than giving or receiving another box of toiletries, a snow globe, a pen set, a scarf, or any number of other tchotchke that would only end up taking up space in a closet or other storage space, don't you think?

Shooting from the Hip

I was asked my opinion on guns earlier today. I normally don't talk about things that bring on heated debates, but I decided to make an exception just this once.

If people want to have a gun in their house or apartment for protection, that's their business.  But I am not among that group. I won't have a handgun, rifle, or any other weapon of calibered destruction in my home. I do not have what it takes to own and use one and I'm not sure every person who does owns one, especially those who carry a concealed weapon practically 24/7/365, truly comprehend all the implications of doing so.
They say if you aim a weapon, you should be prepared to fire it and if you're prepared to fire it, you should be prepared to kill with it. That's the thing. Everything changes when you pull the trigger and the person you aim at, whether they deserve it or not, dies. You have just become judge, jury and executioner in your decision and sometimes it's in the split-second. You can say they deserved it and justify it to yourself and others by whatever means. But, you just took a life and there is no taking it back. People say they can live with that, but I don't think as many who claim they can really can.

There is no amount of firewalling that will consistently keep weapons out of the hands of criminals who acquire them by any means, and also the hands of those of questionable mental health status when acting "normal" until you don't have to can be just that easy. Proponents say that the answer is to arm yourself, to create your own little detente with the rest of the world. But when the others you bear arms against are criminals and people of questionable sanity who also bear arms, somebody's going to fire first and it may not be you.

There is no simple answer to this problem in a land which has the right to bear arms written into its bill of rights. Yes, I'd like to see some tougher and better enforced gun control laws. The small arms proliferation in this country scares me. I don't want to take away anyone's rights, I just want to know that guns are in the hands of people who are really responsible for and with them 100% of the time and if that means that not everybody who wants to gets to carry a gun, so be it.

You can call me a dove, a peace monger, a tree-huggin' hippie. I will bear those labels with honor when it comes to my stance on this topic. Just don't mistake it for someone who won't fight back, 'cause I have and I will and I'm great at improvisation.

Something Wicked This Way Comes

Seed companies are evil.

Okay, they're not really evil, but the marketing strategy of sending out next year's seed catalogue at the beginning of December preys upon the green-deprived consumer, aka me, to such a degree that the once under control withdrawal symptoms from seasonal plant growth loss blossomed once more, every pun intended.

Park Seed Company's catalogue was the first to arrive and it won't be the last. All the perfect little plants on every page, the flowers at their perkiest, the vegetables at their most perfect color and shape, the fruits at their ideal juicy ripeness. And that mini-greenhouse that calls me every year has been improved and is really starting to look like it might fit in my budget -- mmm, greenhouse.

No, no, no !! Evil !! E-vil, I say !!

Yet, I cannot look away because that just makes me look out at a brown and grey New York in December world. Those colorful 135 pages of seed and plant buying fun are calling me like a lover to the garden bed ... and didn't that just take me back to a piece of my life's story that will never be published here.

(*insert naughty giggle*)

I hope somebody's giving me a gift certificate for this place this year.

Evil.